Choosing Happiness… is Hard!
Sometimes you have those “back to reality” moments, where it just feels like the veil of happiness you’ve been putting up for months suddenly comes down and you’re able to see life for what it truly is: unstable.
Choosing happiness is easy when nothing is going wrong. When it’s sunny outside, the birds are chirping, work is easy, friends are around, you’re eating healthy and exercising, etc. Being happy is easy in these moments, and even if certain things happen that could ruin your day, you’re able to pull through them and continue to be happy.
However, this happiness is hard to maintain when it starts to be cold, dark, friends move away, work is hard, you can’t find the time to exercise or the will to be healthy.
How does it get to that? What specific element began this domino effect to a tough period in your life?
I wish I could figure out a way to be happy, or at least focus on the positive aspects of life, at all times, no matter the elements that surround me.
If you have any tips, I’d be more than grateful to get them. Let me know below 😊
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Disquiet Thoughts 
I choose one or more small thing that I can see and appreciate in a positive way, at the end of every day. I’ve recently started writing a short paragraph about it every day on my blog. Before that, it was how I ended my yoga routine. It helps me find an anchor on hard days and over time, I’ve become used to searching and finding for the positive bits. They are there, everyday, even if it’s just appreciating something seemingly normal, like observing a bird, or feeling the wind, or whatever. We get good at things we turn our attention to 🙂
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Thank you for commenting, that reminder actually really helps 🙂 And you’re right, there’s always something positive in our lives that we could be focusing on, I will try to remember that.
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Cultivate your happiness within. Happiness is always within you. It is never outside. We choose happiness.
I have found keeping a gratitude journal is a good practice. I have also found morning pages another good practice. The key is to focus on the good in your life, reminding yourself how great this life really is.
Remember change is inevitable. One thing that does not change is that permanent part of us that does not change. Embrace that.
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Thank you, that’s definitely something I need to work on! 🙂
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You’re welcome. My sister has dealt with clinical depression for most of her life. The gratitude journal helps her. We can’t control what we can’t control. It’s the little tricks we learn on the way that make all of the difference.
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I think having gratitude goes a long way to help hold onto the light even in dark times.
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Definitely something I need to work on, to remind myself of everything there is to be grateful and let go of the negative thoughts! Thank you for the comment 🙂 🙂
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I agree it can definitely be a challenge a
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at times. 😊
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I go through waves where sometimes it seems so easy, like second nature, and other times it’s hard to focus on the positive (even if nothing bad has happened). The reminders help 🙂
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😊 reminders are always helpful to have.
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I often find that the reason I start to feel low is because of the thoughts I’m having about the situation. Changing my mental dialogue to a more affirmative and relaxed one helps. 🙂 Whatever the situation, good or bad, it shall pass.
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Mind blowing
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I think practicing mindfulness for me (download Danny Penman’s for free) has bridged that gap between life is good and life is hard. I think an acceptance of your feelings, or at least not judging them, is crucial. We build whole narratives with just one thought. Our perception becomes our reality. It’s OK not to be OK. You’ll be OK again.
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When we are happy, we know that feel. When we are sad we know the feeling also… It not every time that we feel happiness, there are times when we become sad, it is how things are but then we must not stay too long in sadness before we become happy again because it can affect us and change our perspective of the good we are in life….. So when we are sad we should remember those things that makes us happy, and those people that care about us as well and be grateful. Happiness is not only when u feel it or when good things happen, it is when you are thankful… 👌👌👌Great post and it’s being a while since you’ve posted .. I hope you keep up with the good work👍👍👍
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That’s a great way to put it, thank you for the comment! ☺☺
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Gratitude indeed is a powerful thing. I recently started learning synthesizer and find it very soothing. Interestingly, there is a very popular course on happiness by Yale University. Maybe it will be of some interest to you. https://thinkinglistener.wordpress.com/2018/06/16/the-science-of-well-being-happiness-course/
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I wish I could say I was always successful to turn things around but those times I can feel happiness in the face of bad moments it’s because I try to realistically look at the situation without emotion. I try to simply just accept it for what it is, realize that some things are just out of my hands and decide to find the positive in it. And if there is none, there just isn’t. But I just don’t take it personally. Hope that helps!
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The secret is not to aim for happiness. It is a byproduct. If you do your best to be of service to others, to live a meaningful life, you will be content, regardless of what may go wrong. You can read my ideas on Buddhist attitudes at Bobbing Around.
Have a good life,
Bob
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That is very true! Thanks for commenting.
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